Karaoke Nights

Its Saturday Night in New York City!!!!
So, What and where is the party place in Queens that West Texas Millionaires are debuting? Its the Nest! Yes, It is Saturday and the place to be on a Saturday Night! You see, Larry Compeleta, the originator of the event of Kareoke, came up with the idea 20 years ago when the Viet Nam Veterans fund was getting cuts in their funding. Ergo, the pub got the lead, and now, Karaoke was a hit!

Larry, who is in a motorized chair, blind with black shaded lens glasses, and is assisted with the tool of a vocalizer due to mucho cigarette smoking, opens every Saturday night karaoke with the tune "fun fun fun, on the autobon" by Kraftwerk. As you know, the tune does change key, and so Larry has to go to a higher pitch vibrator, like a blues man would with harmonicas. It is a gem to witness, and I know you will enjoy it. Dan and the boys will follow up with the new tunes from the new album, so if you can make it, you will be entertained to the max. THE MAX I TELL YOU!!

Millionaire Questionaire Answers

Howdy, here is the answers to the Millionaire Questionaire forum. Hope you are the top fan!



Answers

1. a, 3; b, 1; c, 2
2. d
3. the horny toad
4. c
5. a, 2; b, 5; c, 6; d, 7; e, 1; f, 3; g, 4
6. the King Ranch
7. a
8. Old Yeller
9. b
10. e
11. c
12. b
13. Cadillac Ranch

WTM in NYC

West Texas Millionaires are in New York City doing some music business for their next cd. They had a semi-business lunch at the local Queens bar named "The Nest". As Dan was doing the logistics with a music director, Roger was on stage singing Karaoke to Taylor Swifts, "Teardrops on my Guitar".
Every thing looks good for the band as they do the business end of this type of industry, and just trying to drive around Queens after hanging out in a little town like Bisbee can drive you nuts. Memories still serves when they had to go to the Garden for 3 night shows.

Roadside Assistance

Well, Dan is hardly out of the gate driving to New York, New York when his truck started giving him trouble. If any of you have made the waltz across Texas, you know that it feels like 4 days than 2. And you also know that you better have all your fluids checked and done everything in your power to make that trip.
Not Dan, nooo, that would take the ADVENTURE out of the equation. So there he is in Turkey Texas with engine troubles. Not major per se, he just forgot to put in coolant and now it is going into steam engine mode, and that then caused a hose to rupture, which sprayed the whole engine with what water was left.
One thing he did do was pay his cell phone bill and gave a call to Rhonda's Roadside Rescue for her expertise. Yes, She is an oasis in that Texas desert, rolling up in her rig to fix whatever is ailing your truck and make it allll better....


Dan was thankful, and stood there asking questions like, "What does that do"; "you call that a 'cresent' wrench?"; and a bunch of other questions about motorworks. After a few replacements and adjustments, Dan was back on the road thanks to Rhonda's help. So the adventure continues, and Dan is probably having breakfast at Ricky's Cafe in Chickashaw, Ok. as we speak.
Be safe out there Dan.

Today's Tall Texas Tales

A VISITOR ASKED A WEST TEXAS COWBOY, "DO YOU EVER GET TORNADOES around here?" The cowboy said, "Yeah, we had one a while back, but it ran into a sandstorm outside of town and got ripped to pieces."

THE WIND BLOWS SO HARD OUT IN WEST TEXAS THAT AT A DRIVE-IN THEATER once it blew Gene Autry right out of the saddle.

A LITTLE BROWN HEN GOT CAUGHT IN A WEST TEXAS WINDSTORM. SHE was flying through the air backward so fast that she laid the same egg three times.

IT WAS SO WINDY THE PRAIRIE DOGS WERE DIGGING HOLES FORTY FEET in the air.

Millionaire Questionaire

We know that we have many faithful adoring fans out there, but if you are really, really, really dedicated to the WTM, you will participate in our Millionaire Questionaire. To answer the questions post on the comment button. We will post the top 5 WTM Fan Exam finalists. Here we go:

1. Match the celebrity with the Texas pork product he endorses:
A singer Jimmy Dean 1. Blue Ribbon Bacon
B former football coach Bum Phillips 2. Earl Campbell Hot Sausage
C former football star Earl Campbell 3. Jimmy Dean sausage

2. Which of these is not a Texas state symbol?
A bluebonnet
B pecan tree
C mockingbird
D electric chair



3. Identify this animal:



4. Which of these critters does not live in Texas?
A tarantula
B alligator
C naked mole rat
D mountain lion


5. Match the place name on the left with the appropriate subject on the right:
A Houston 1. cantaloupe
B El Paso 2. medicine
C Tyler 3. tourism
D Midland 4. fashion
E Pecos 5. boots
F South Padre Island 6. roses
G Dallas 7. oil


6. What Texas ranch is bigger than Rhode Island?

7. Which of the following common Texas words is the only one spelled correctly?
A rodeo
B barbeque
C ya’ll
D margerita

8. What dog story, a national best-seller in 1956, has been required reading for millions of Texas schoolkids ever since?

9. What meat do Texans favor for barbecue?
A pork
B beef
C chicken
D any form of roadkill

10. Which of these foods was not invented in Texas?
A Fritos
B chili
C red grapefruit
D maroon carrots
E burritos

11. On back roads, many drivers signal to others cars by lifting only one or two fingers while keeping their hands on the wheel. What do Texans call this gesture?
A the West Texas wave
B the sumbitch salute
C the hi sign
D the bird

12. A common Texas nickname for boys is “Bubba,” which is baby talk for:
A baby
B brother
C buddy
D Beelzebub

13. What is the name of the alfresco automotive sculpture west of Amarillo?

Today's Tall Texas Tales

ATTENDING THE FUNERAL OF A TEXAS MILLIONAIRE WHO WAS BURIED, according to his last request, in his favorite Cadillac, a poor relation commented, "Yessirree--that's what I call livin'!"

A TEXAN WAS VISITING NEW YORK. WHILE HE WAS HAVING A DRINK AT A BAR, an attractive woman sat down next to him. "Hello, honey," he said. "I'm Billy Bob Smith fr-"

"Don't tell me," she said. "You're from Texas."

"How'd you know?" he asked.

"You called me `honey,' your name's Billy Bob, and you sure seem tall sitting there on that bar stool."

"Well, you're right," Billy Bob said, "but I have to tell you, I'm not really that tall--I'm just sitting on my wallet."

Live at the Stock Exchange

This is a rare unseen footage of the band playing at the Stock exchange. This could easily match the Beatles "Cavern" musical dates.

Interview with producer Peter Swan

Peter Swan did the producing on the WTM last album, and I had time to ask him some questions on how it came about, the producer that tries to get that right sound. Here is a portion of the interview:

“The first time I recorded Dan Simonis doing “Big Back Seat” he sounded very laid back, maybe a bit like Dean Martin, but after I screamed my head off, turning red in the face like a lobster, spittin' blood, and throwing the guitar case against the wall, while kickin' him in the butt with my cowboy boots, rantin' -- "Hey Dan, this is ROLLIN' ROCK, not a sissy-boy resting home!!!!" -- well then things started happening!! Dan caught on real fast, and delivered a smokin' ragin' version of "Arizona", which a few years later became a Number One Hit in all the Rock'n'Roll dance halls across England!!
It was very easy to get Dan to "click", because Dan felt the music deep in his heart and soul. Dan grew up on Rhythm & Blues and Hillbilly Music and therefore all he needed was a nudge, a sympathetic producer who loved and lived Rock'n'Roll Music, like ME, ha!, and who was not a groupie of de-sexed sissified anti-American 1960s crapola!
That's what I mean by who is in front of the mike, and who is behind the mike! Both positions--visavi the mike-- have to be pro Rock'n'Roll, and anti pop-schmaltz.
As far as mike placement is concerned, I do NOT like close-miking, because it tends to sound somewhat "dry" and "sterile" in most instances.
I try to leave enough room for most mikes to pick up some of the other instruments, this way the recording will sound more natural, like you are in a small night club, but not as muddled.

Today's Tale Texas Tales

TWO PRETTY GIRLS WERE TAKING A WALK WHEN THEY CAME UPON A FROG, which surprised them by saying, "Please kiss me. If you do, I'll turn into a Texas oilman." One of the girls picked up the frog, looked at him, then popped him into her purse. "Aren't you going to kiss him?" her friend asked. "No," the girl said. "These days a talking frog is worth a lot more than a Texas oilman."

A TEXAS WILDCATTER WHO WAS VISITING PARIS FOR THE FIRST TIME IN many years went to see the Eiffel Tower. After staring at it for a moment, he turned to a fellow tourist and said, "I can't believe it--after all these years, they still haven't struck oil!"

A RICH OILMAN DIED AND WENT TO HEAVEN, ONLY TO FIND THE GATE CLOSED. Saint Peter apologized. "I'm sorry," he said, "but we have too many oilmen in heaven already." The oilman told Saint Peter, "Don't worry. Let me in, and I can solve your problem." So Saint Peter let him in, and the oilman went up to every other Texas oilman in heaven and whispered in his ear, "Word is they found a big new field down in hell." One by one, the oilmen left heaven and went to hell. A few days later Saint Peter found the helpful oilman packing up to leave. "Where are you going?" he asked. "Hell," the oilman replied. "So many drillers have headed south, I figure there must be something to that rumor after all."

West Texas Millionaire along for the ride

'Three's Company' star Joyce DeWitt had three too many this weekend and it landed her in handcuffs. The actress, best known for playing the third wheel to John Ritter and Suzanne Somers on the popular show, was arrested for drunk driving on the Fourth of July. Police say the 60-year-old DeWitt was pulled over after she drove past a park barricade and then arrested for DUI when she failed a field sobriety test.
Riding in the car with her was Roger Thoreson, guitarist for the West Texas Millionaires and long time friend of DeWitt. He was released at the site because he did not have a blood alcohol level high enough for a public intoxication charge. "We were just bar hopping trying to find a blonde."
Thanks to Roger, she was released on bail, but not before she took a mug shot for the celebrity hall of shame (pictured).

Today's Tall Texas Tales

Well, I know most of you had a great 4th of July weekend, was just perfect with the rain, but enough with the mushy stuff, don't want to go to far and start seeing your "aura" geezz.....
Anywho, here is your medication for Monday Morning Ma Ma Please hold me.
Yes thats right, pull yourself up by your boot straps and enjoy:

A TEXAS OILMAN TOOK A TAXI TO THE AIRPORT and handed the driver a $100 bill. The driver asked, "Don't you have anything smaller?" Surprised, the Texan replied, "Do they make 'em any smaller?"

THE WIFE OF A NEWLY RICH WILDCATTER BUILT A fancy mansion and held a party to celebrate its completion. When a guest asked how many bathrooms the house had, the hostess replied proudly, "I can seat fourteen."

A WILDCATTER WENT TO THE DENTIST. "EVERYthing looks fine," the dentist said. "Go ahead and drill anyway," said the wildcatter. "I feel lucky today."


There, now go out there and show 'em who Halliburton looks to for inspiration.....

Why the Pink Cadillac?

Some of you are thinking why do the West Texas Millionaires ride in a pink Cadillac? You may be ready to recite the fighting words “Only two things come from Texas...” Well, before you get your bones broken one at a time, let me explain the story....

You see, men like to capture time in relics, trophies if you will. Things to help them remember the best of times, like bowling trophies, deer antlers, and in this case, a Cadillac. It was July 4, 1976, Dan just turned 17, but had a fake I.D. He was experiencing the Fort Worth/Dallas bars with a vengeance. You see, at that time, the legal age to drink was 18, and the bartenders were just wanting to get paid. Dan did the deed, dropped a dollar in the jar and got his lone star longneck. There was a bicentennial celebration taking place at The Greenville Bar and Grille, and at the end of the bar was a cougar yelling at the bartender, “I SAID A DRY MARTINI!!! AND NO AWLIVFF!!!” (spit, spittle, sputter)

Then it happened, the tragic eye contact between Dan and the cougar. She looked him up and down, snarled lowly and moved closer. “High (intentional), my name is Marylyn Roger Theard, ever heard thaw name?" Dan did not, of course to him it sounded like "Marlin Roger III". He was still trying to lay low to get a second beer, but was doomed to blow his cover.

Marylyn Roger Theard, who is this cougar? She was the daughter of Mary Kay Ash, multi-millionaire business women of cosmetics. In 1973 Marylyn won the honor of getting a pink cadillac under her Mother’s business. She worked hard for it, too hard, wanting to gain the acceptance that she never got from her Mother/mentor. Seeing that there was going to be no motherly nurturing, the beginning of her Swan Song began. Four years later, leaving the Mary Kay business, she was living on the “royalties”, spending her savings fast, divorcing her husband with a nice divorce agreement that would hold her for....15 years of hard living. Now at the age of 41, she wanted to only have fun, fun with Dan. He was an awe-struck 17 year old.

“Lets go” she said, and Dan followed her to the car, THE CAR, and they went to White Rock Lake to watch the fireworks from the back seat. Dan would later reminisce that moment in "Big Back Seat." They then went to the Adophus Hotel where her room was. They made it up to the room and after more cocktails, and she wanted to get the party started, and Dan was ready. 15 minutes later, She is falling asleep, and Dan wanted a trophy to remember this, and going down to the car with her keys, he started the engine.
Off into cool Texas night air with the top down, listening to AM country radio....he concludes, "need to get some long horns for the grille..."

And now you know....the rest of the story......